How to Find the Purpose in Your Pain: Book Preview (Part 2)
Have you ever asked God, “Lord, why am I going through this?” Have you ever wondered, “Will I ever heal from this pain?” We all have moments where we go through hard times. You aren’t alone! However, rarely do we get to experience the purpose behind the trial and the blessing behind the mess. My new e-book, How to Find the Purpose in Your Pain, will teach you how to find purpose in the deepest areas of trauma and hurt in your life so you can learn how to find the hidden good behind your greatest struggles.
Book Excerpt Chapter 1:
At the time that my former husband and I were mourning our daughter, I had a friend, who we will call Katy, who opened her vacation home to me.
I explained to her how difficult it was to grieve Sarah in my small hometown. I lived in an area where everyone knew everyone. You couldn’t even go into Walmart without bumping into your high school classmate! Even a simple trip to the grocery store seemed to turn into a conversation where someone was asking me about Sarah’s death.
I felt like I needed to get away where no one knew my name. I wanted to mourn in peace with only a few close friends and family. So, when Katy heard my frustrations, she offered her beautiful vacation property to me as a gift. It was one of the most beautiful homes I had ever seen. Yes, it was a mansion indeed.
It had five bedrooms, overlooked a large private lake, and included a farm with beautiful horses. It also had more than enough nature trails where I could peacefully walk in the beautiful summer sun while gazing at miles of gorgeous trees.
More importantly, it was significantly far away from anyone I knew in my hometown. It was the perfect place to just be. I didn’t have to put on airs about how I was feeling, answer questions about how I was doing, or feel pressure to smile when I wanted to cry. I could just be myself. Me, my husband at that time, a couple of close girlfriends, and God. That was it. And it was more than enough.
As I would walk along those trails during those summer afternoons, it was like I could hear God saying, “I’m here to grieve with you daughter. You’ll get through this and you’re not alone.”
Fortunately, I wasn’t working full-time at that point. So, I had more free time during the day to rest in the presence of the Lord. I found myself praying for six hours on some days. At times, I would worship. Other times, I would just sit in His presence and not say a word.
Each time that I got up from my prayer room, I felt like I was beginning to understand a side of God that I had never known before. God was healing my perception and clearing my spiritual lenses.
Instead of seeing God’s love through the lens of my pain, I was learning to see my pain through the lens of God’s love.
The depth of my pain had also driven me to a deeper hunger for Him. In that hunger, I began to seek His Word and seek His presence like never before.
Each time in prayer, I was completely unaware of what was occurring around me. His love and presence were so profound that I lost consciousness of my worries, my problems, and my grief. I would leave the room with this overwhelming sensation of love and peace that’s unlike anything you could ever find in this world.
After I prayed, it would take me a moment to gather my natural senses again. Because of the time that it took me to regain my consciousness, those special moments with God reminded me of the spiritual revelations that Paul described in 2 Corinthians 12:1-4. During certain times of his spiritual walk with Christ, Paul recalled that he was unsure whether he was out of his body or within his body. Although I knew I was within my body, everything about those hours was so unnaturally peaceful. It was like a wave of indescribable love came to cover my entire being.
Who was this God who could be anything He wanted but decided to be love? Who was this God who commanded the whole universe but still cared about my issues? (Psalm 8:4-6 NKJV)
In those moments, nothing else mattered. My bills, my enemies, and my burdens seemed so insignificant in the wave of His love. I still had moments of sadness but my hope had returned.
I could cry while finding joy in my tears and I could grieve while finding hope in my sorrow.
Quite honestly, it was such an intimate time that it’s challenging to put into words. Somehow, I was grieving a pain I had never known while also gaining a love I had never experienced. I was indeed beginning to understand “pain’s partnership with joy” (Women’s Study Bible 1513)…{Book Sample Ends Here}
Love,
